Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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