Three words: puerto rican gang bang
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
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