But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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