i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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