I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
