tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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