and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
