if i can run in heels then i can drive
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
