I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
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