grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
