Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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