All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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