You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
