you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Randomize