I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
That's how pantless uber rides happen
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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