just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
