If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
