I'm drive I can fine osifer
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
