there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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