this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize
