Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize