And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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