yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
