I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
