I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Randomize