so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
