I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
