A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
What a dumb baby whore.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
