if only i could text you this smell
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize