Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
