I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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