I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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