We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
