oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Damn victory sex feels great
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize