school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
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