I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
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