Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
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