i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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