Need sex. Gaining weight.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
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