The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
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