it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
