I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize