Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
