That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
