Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
