school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
