Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
