We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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