I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
