I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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