ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
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