haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
