I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
