I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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